Monday, June 9, 2014

Of Love and Loss

I don’t know how to write this post. I don’t want to write it. But, I am told that writing it out will help me feel better in some way, as if the simple act of putting words to paper will take my pain away. I know it won’t. The pain is too deep and all consuming. Three weeks ago on May 19, my husband passed away. It was not expected. It was a total, utter shock, that has not stopped. Three weeks ago tonight, he simply went to sleep and drifted away from me. He felt no pain, he had no idea what was happening. His heart simply stopped. He was only 59 years old. I still don’t believe it, it is too unreal. But deep inside I know it is real. I know it happened and he is gone from my life forever. I didn’t think I could endure this much pain and continue to survive, to function. But, I am, because I have no other choice. I thank God all of my grown children are here with me, because I don’t want to be alone. But I am alone, in a house full of people, for the first time in twenty years.

The last thing we did together was laugh. I am grateful for that. I take comfort in knowing that our last moments together were joyous. I don’t remember if I told him I loved him that night, or even that day. I hope I did. But I know that he knew I did, just as I know how much he loved me.  That is one of the things I am grateful for. I have always felt secure in his love for me. I never had any cause to doubt it. 

My mind is in turmoil, jumbled with memories and questions. So many questions. Why didn’t I see any signs? Why didn’t I wake up? Could I have done something to save him? Why on that night of all nights had he slept in another room? (he had back trouble and didn’t want to disturb my sleep with his tossing and turning) I’ll never have any answers.

I want so desperately to talk to him. To just be with him.

All I can do is to write here the same thing I said most nights when we went to bed.

Good night honey. I love you.

 

 

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

A Little Bit of Black and White for Spring

So. In my usual dedication to my plans, I went in a totally different direction with my sewing than I had planned.  Last night I cut out a sundress and two pairs of lace leggings for my granddaughter to be sewn up today.  I was ready to sew - actually at the machine - when a flash of black and white caught my eye peaking out from under a pile of fabric.  About a year ago I found a black and white valance at the thrift store, still in it’s packaging.  The cute strip of gingham across the middle was the deciding factor.  That and the 25 cent price tag. I planned to take it home and make a skirt out of it for Mackensie.  But as usual my plans changed, I moved on to another project and the valance languished amongst all the other forgotten pieces of loveliness in my fabric chest. Fast forward to a few weeks ago when I found another piece of fun black and white fabric covered in horses, in a pile of fabric given to me by a friend.  Mackensie loves horses, so I knew it would be well received when sewn up.  Again I had big plans, again they were forgotten. Beginning to see a pattern here?  Well today was the day.  I only had enough of the horse fabric to cut out a bodice, so I used some polka dot remnants for the sleeves.  I made a simple peasant blouse which I think pairs perfectly with the gathered skirt I made from the valance.  I love that the patterns are different on each piece, but fit together so well. I was surprised and happy to see that the black on each fabric was the same. Black can be so hard to match.   Mackensie loves the outfit.  Not just for the horses, but the twirly skirt. The most important item of clothing in a two year old’s wardrobe!  I think this little outfit will be adorable paired with a red cardi, or any other bright colour for that matter.
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Tomorrow we move on to day three of KCW.  Have you made grand plans?  I have. I have a sundress and two pairs of lace leggings to sew. But wait………what is the lovely piece of red fabric I see dancing in the corner of the sewing table…
Happy Stitching!

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KCW Day One

I thought for the first day of KCW it would be a good idea to finish up two dresses that I started a couple of weeks ago for my granddaughter Mackensie. I was itching to start a new project, but I knew that if I did I would just push these dresses aside and think ‘I’ll finish them later’ and forget all about them until I want her to wear one of them. Do you do that too? I get near to the end of a project and am already thinking of the next one. The anticipation of starting a new project can be overwhelming and the lure of beautiful fabric and adorable patterns hard to resist! But, I managed to restrain myself and was able to finish both dresses this afternoon. I also cut out two pairs of stretch lace leggings and another sundress that I will sew up tomorrow.

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Happy stitching!

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Sunday, April 6, 2014

Are You Ready?

I am, just about! Tomorrow is the first day of the 2014 Spring/Fall edition of Kids Clothes Week.  For the first time ever there is a theme, Mini Me.  Although I can’t promise that my makes will be mini versions of my own wardrobe, (which is one of the guidelines but not mandatory) I plan to have fun making items for my lovely granddaughter that I would wear if I could. Strappy spring and summer dresses in bright beautiful fabrics, and a few other things that I think will be welcome additions to a busy two year old’s wardrobe. Everything I plan to make will be from stash fabrics and notions, which gives me plenty of choices!

Today I plan to organise my fabric and patterns and cut things out ready to sew. Since Mackensie insists in wearing dresses nearly every day the bulk of my sewing will be dresses and skirts and tops. I also plan to make a pair or two of stretch lace leggings to wear with dresses and skirts while the weather is still too cold for bare legs. I’d also like to make a bolero or two to wear with her strappy sundresses, to protect her little shoulders from the sun, and for when the air-conditioning is a little cool at her daycare.

What are your plans?

 

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                                                    To read more about KCW look here!

 

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Wednesday, February 5, 2014

February Freeze Pattern Patter Team Blitz

Hello! Are you enjoying this wonderful winter weather? (cough, cough)  If you are like me and would rather be inside sewing than outside freezing, make a plan to join me and my Pattern Patter teammates this coming Saturday February 8th, for our mega Pattern Blitz sale! There will be 100's of new listings of vintage and newer sewing and craft patterns. Many shops will be featuring special discounts for the sale. I'm sure you'll find several patterns that you love, that will keep you inside sewing something fabulous!


My shop, Stitching By Numbers, will be featuring a 20% discount on everything in the shop. Just remember to add the code 'BLITZ' at checkout. See you there!


Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Christmas Recap in January

With the new year well underway, I thought I would carry on my tradition of being late to the party. After the whirlwind of the holidays, I was just too exhausted to even think about posting. My fibro kicked in with a vengeance and I spent a few days relaxing, reading other’s blogs and planning the many sewing projects I want to do.
We had a wonderful family filled Christmas, with lots of good food, great company and merriment.

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My granddaughter MacKensie decorated gingerbread cookies for the first time, and was quite thrilled with the outcome!

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There were Christmas concerts at church,

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Please forgive the awful picture quality, quick pictures with my phone were all I could manage. MacKensie is second from the left in the top row. They were all so adorable, singing Jingle Bells while shaking their bells. They all wore their jammies for the performance, adding to the cuteness!
I hope your holidays were as wonderful as ours, and I wish all the best for you and your families for the new year!
Happy Stitching!
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